I nearly threw up in a meeting at work today. Although I've been vaguely queasy for a couple of weeks, especially in the evenings, this was the first time it really hit me; a wave of hot, sweaty nausea unlike anything else. Luckily I was in a room full of midwives, so they just ignored me and carried on regardless. Suggestions were made about ginger biscuits and keeping small plastic bags in one's pocket.
About three the walking-through-treacle tiredness struck and it was time to come home or sleep under my desk. So much for evening classes. I'm too tired to hang up my clothes, too tired to cook, the fish tank is green but thankfully it rained so I don't have to worry about the garden. I'm living off takeways and whatever the work canteen has to offer and hoping that the expensive vitamins compensate for the lack of nutrition. This is why I needed a husband. Damn, I knew I'd forgotten something...
The baby seems to want me to sit still, he's organising himself a heartbeat this week, growing some limb buds. Apparently progesterone is a sedative, I think it must be a tranquiliser too. The high levels in early pregnancy cause tiredness, mood swings and nausea. Hopefully most of that will only last another six weeks, but time is passing so slowly for me right now. Every day is a week long. But underlying the calm/sad/exhausted/queasy waves is a core of strange joy. I have a mystery passenger and nothing is ever going to be the same again.
