OK. So nineteen weeks was Hell Week. We were assessing students five days in a row, I had two assessments to hand in, my computer was still broken and then the new one broke too. My evil colleague complained to our boss, who complained to her boss about me because I booked my 19 week scan during Hell Week. Funnily enough I didn't have much of an option but to have my 19 week scan when I was 19 weeks pregnant. I was livid. I have found a sneaky way to get revenge though; revenge by flagging up procedural irregularities that will make her squirm. It needed sorted out, because the irregularities are causing problems, it just pleases me that she'll be most annoyed by it.
The 19 week scan was amazing. She's a girl. Esme Alice, I think. I was so worried about cleft palates that the sonographer gave me a free 4D scan of he face. She looks like her daddy; she's beautiful. I send him the pictures and we emailed a bit about legal stuff. Custody of anything happens to me, birth certificates and child support. He is quite determined that he doesn't want anything whatsoever to do with the baby. But he does want to know when she is born.
Monday, June 9, 2008
Monday, May 26, 2008
Eighteen weeks
Still knackered. This week's new pregnancy horror; heartburn. I'm sucking on antacids as I type. My laptop has died, [flattie denies all knowledge] and I have way, way too much work to do. Work politics is grim. But my first set of baby clothes arrived on the weekend and they are so utterly cute that just looking at them cheers me up.
So, on the upside...I can salary sacrifice my new laptop and it'll be very fast and have all the latest software...I'm feeling more energetic...I actually like the taste of rennies...I've met some single mothers by choice online and they are very friendly and helpful...the flattie dashed out and brought me some Philadelphia with strawberries just because I saw it advertised and fancied it.
So, on the upside...I can salary sacrifice my new laptop and it'll be very fast and have all the latest software...I'm feeling more energetic...I actually like the taste of rennies...I've met some single mothers by choice online and they are very friendly and helpful...the flattie dashed out and brought me some Philadelphia with strawberries just because I saw it advertised and fancied it.
Saturday, May 17, 2008
Seventeen weeks
Approaching half way. The house sale is progressing well. Work is very busy, very political and in some ways quite frustrating. Two of the other lecturers keep harping on about me being a paediatric nurse, which I find very annoying. It's not as if I have any choice in the matter. One of them seems to think I shouldn't be in my job at all and it's been really getting to me. She wants me to not mention children at all. But children's nursing is all I know, and it's a bit part of who I am. I've tried talking to her but I think I'm going to have to have a firmer word, before I end up really upset.
On the train back from my antenatal appointment, [very dull - just a BP and a chat, no doppler], I picked up a property paper for Greensborough, Briar Hill, Eltham, Ivanhoe etc and had a sudden burst of inspiration. For 400k I can buy a 4 bed house, 20 minutes from work, and live surrounded by trees and hills. I went to Montmorency for lunch on Sunday and it's lovely there. There is a little high street with a couple of nice cafes, a Foodworks, an organic shop and a deli. There are more shops in Eltham, which is one train stop away, and a good library there too. There are good local state schools and really lovely walks and cycle tracks. It feels very adult, but I suppose I'm going to be a mother, so I need to start thinking like one.
I really need a holiday. I'm tired and fed up with work. I haven't had a holiday in months and I'm the kind of person who needs regular breaks. However, I want to save my holiday for the end of pregnancy. If I tack my annual leave onto my maternity leave I can stop work in September, at 34 weeks and have six weeks to rest and nest and hoefully sort out my new house. But it does mean I have no energy now. I had a dinner on Thursday and was useless on Friday and I've not found the energy to go food shopping yet this weekend. I just want to snuggle on the sofa and read my book.
On the train back from my antenatal appointment, [very dull - just a BP and a chat, no doppler], I picked up a property paper for Greensborough, Briar Hill, Eltham, Ivanhoe etc and had a sudden burst of inspiration. For 400k I can buy a 4 bed house, 20 minutes from work, and live surrounded by trees and hills. I went to Montmorency for lunch on Sunday and it's lovely there. There is a little high street with a couple of nice cafes, a Foodworks, an organic shop and a deli. There are more shops in Eltham, which is one train stop away, and a good library there too. There are good local state schools and really lovely walks and cycle tracks. It feels very adult, but I suppose I'm going to be a mother, so I need to start thinking like one.
I really need a holiday. I'm tired and fed up with work. I haven't had a holiday in months and I'm the kind of person who needs regular breaks. However, I want to save my holiday for the end of pregnancy. If I tack my annual leave onto my maternity leave I can stop work in September, at 34 weeks and have six weeks to rest and nest and hoefully sort out my new house. But it does mean I have no energy now. I had a dinner on Thursday and was useless on Friday and I've not found the energy to go food shopping yet this weekend. I just want to snuggle on the sofa and read my book.
Thursday, May 8, 2008
Sixteen Weeks
Monday, 04.00am I woke up in quite a lot of pain. Hip, pelvis, lower back, lower abdomen, it was all really sore. I was awake and miserable and terrified for an hour and then it stopped. Just when I was contemplating calling the midwives. Then I had a limp and couldn't stand for more than a few minutes without nearly crying with the pain. Pregnancy isn't supposed to be this painful, apparently. So Tuesday I went to see the student osteopaths in the next building. And, result, my student is 36 weeks pregnant and having her baby at the same place as me. They had a look and declared that my pubic bone was out of alignment and my aductors way too tight. Then there was some torturous massage of my inner thighs, [really it was agony - I had no idea my thighs were so tense - must be the lack of sex], a weird knee thing which made my pelvis make this very soft click and then suddenly I was pain free. Magic. I'd limped there with an incredible sore left hip and I bounced away all better, and it only cost me $25. I came home and slept for ten hours, for the first time in tweleve weeks. Hurrah.
Today I'm a bit sore again but I know what to stretch to fix it. Shame there's no handy man to wrap my thighs around. Especially as I am one very sexy pregnant woman. Sigh.
Today I'm a bit sore again but I know what to stretch to fix it. Shame there's no handy man to wrap my thighs around. Especially as I am one very sexy pregnant woman. Sigh.
Thursday, May 1, 2008
Fifteen weeks
It has been a busy week. I've sold the house! But it'll take about three months for the sale to go through and three months to buy here, which brings me up to my due date. Fabulous timing but I will not have a baby crawling on these icky rented carpets! The nasty cold has settled down to a sniffle and there's been no more bleeding. My swabs were clear, so my cervix is just sore, not infected. The bump continues to grow. I'm now having to wear maternity clothes most days and can't do up the zip on my favorite skirt. I bought another $250 of maternity gear, including a gorgeous red wool dress. This was lucky, as they sprung an interview on me on Tuesday. 17.15 in the evening, so both they and I were quite tired and we just had a nice chat really. I doubt I'll get the job, but it was good experience putting the application together.
Phil and I have won a small grant to conduct some research. This is very good news for me as I need some publications on my CV and Phil has loads of experience. I'm very fortunate he's working with me. I've also put in for another small grant and today I'm meeting with a potential phd supervisor at Melbourne Uni.
Matty the flattie is working out well. He keeps me amused with his seemingly endless stories of new dates and is out enough that I still have enough space. He's very opinionated about baby names though. He and Justin have decided that I must call my baby Leo. I'm keen on Elliot today. Elliot or Esme, which nobody objects to. The baby is now 9.5cm from head to rump, or about 15cm in total if he has his father's beautiful long legs. He has fingernails just starting this week, and he's looking more like a real baby, just in minature. I think it's possible to feel the kicking on the outside by 20 weeks. It's just the most astonishingly intimate thing; having this baby moving inside me.
I still sometimes feel quite unsure about how I'm going to cope. I work out the maths and sometimes it's seems adequate and sometimes it seems very frightening indeed. I should have a good six months of being comfortable. After that is anyone's guess. I'm going to start buying the fun things; a baby wrap or a sling, some manchester, I'll look again at cots. Cots are so amazingly variable in price. Do I want to spend $200 or $2000? Is there really much difference? It's not like I'll be using it for ten years. The ikea $200 ones seem fine, just not so pretty and surely I'll need the extra money for food? I can always pretty it up with nice sheets. I just need one that will line up with my bed, so that I just have to lean over and grab him when he's hungry.
Phil and I have won a small grant to conduct some research. This is very good news for me as I need some publications on my CV and Phil has loads of experience. I'm very fortunate he's working with me. I've also put in for another small grant and today I'm meeting with a potential phd supervisor at Melbourne Uni.
Matty the flattie is working out well. He keeps me amused with his seemingly endless stories of new dates and is out enough that I still have enough space. He's very opinionated about baby names though. He and Justin have decided that I must call my baby Leo. I'm keen on Elliot today. Elliot or Esme, which nobody objects to. The baby is now 9.5cm from head to rump, or about 15cm in total if he has his father's beautiful long legs. He has fingernails just starting this week, and he's looking more like a real baby, just in minature. I think it's possible to feel the kicking on the outside by 20 weeks. It's just the most astonishingly intimate thing; having this baby moving inside me.
I still sometimes feel quite unsure about how I'm going to cope. I work out the maths and sometimes it's seems adequate and sometimes it seems very frightening indeed. I should have a good six months of being comfortable. After that is anyone's guess. I'm going to start buying the fun things; a baby wrap or a sling, some manchester, I'll look again at cots. Cots are so amazingly variable in price. Do I want to spend $200 or $2000? Is there really much difference? It's not like I'll be using it for ten years. The ikea $200 ones seem fine, just not so pretty and surely I'll need the extra money for food? I can always pretty it up with nice sheets. I just need one that will line up with my bed, so that I just have to lean over and grab him when he's hungry.
Wednesday, April 23, 2008
Fourteen weeks
Well, the last week has been fairly hellish. I can't sell my house in the UK. The market has collapsed and my estate agents are useless muppets. If I can't sell my house I'm fucked. I'm relying on that money to live on when I am at home with the baby. Moreover the rent doesn't cover the mortgage, it's costing me $230 dollars a month. I actually cried down the phone to my agents. I'm just so worried about how I'm going to look after my baby if the house doesn't sell. But I have found new agents who seem keen and say they can sell it quickly. I've dropped the price £50k of asking and hopefully if will sell.
I've also been sick for the last three days. Sore throat, headaches, cough and then abdo cramping and bleeding. So back I went to the emergancy department at Mercy. In tears, again, terrified that not only was I bankrupt but the baby was in trouble. It was that unfriendly midwife again but this time I saw a lovely gynae and his boss, who is from Northern Ireland. We had a look at the baby, who is still cute and wriggly and fine and they looked at my cervix, which is very unhappy indeed. It seems that some of the inner cervix cells have grown onto the outer cervix, because of the pregnancy hormones and they aren't happy there, which is why they are bleeding. It also looked inflamed, so they have given me some flagyl just in case it's infected too. They don't think it'll do any harm to the baby. It's a nuisance but not concerning.
I so need this long weekend.
I've also been sick for the last three days. Sore throat, headaches, cough and then abdo cramping and bleeding. So back I went to the emergancy department at Mercy. In tears, again, terrified that not only was I bankrupt but the baby was in trouble. It was that unfriendly midwife again but this time I saw a lovely gynae and his boss, who is from Northern Ireland. We had a look at the baby, who is still cute and wriggly and fine and they looked at my cervix, which is very unhappy indeed. It seems that some of the inner cervix cells have grown onto the outer cervix, because of the pregnancy hormones and they aren't happy there, which is why they are bleeding. It also looked inflamed, so they have given me some flagyl just in case it's infected too. They don't think it'll do any harm to the baby. It's a nuisance but not concerning.
I so need this long weekend.
Sunday, April 20, 2008
Sexy back
This week I've been feeling more and more like myself, or perhaps I'm just becoming used to the new me. I spent another $250 on maternity wear, as now nothing from before fits and work was becoming a bit of a nightmare. So I'm two pairs of maternity jeans richer and have several new tops. I definitely look sexier, there were looks from random blokes on the tram, before they notce the bump and look a bit confused. Maternity wear helps to make me look pregnant, rather than just blobby. And it is all bump, well, bump and boobs. My boss actually stroked my belly this week, which was weird. I reckon I'll have to get used to that. The pregnancy 'glow' is settling down to be less like teenage hormonal skin and more actual glow, thankfully.
I'm working my way through recipes from 'Feeding the Bump' and I've just finished realing Adele Parks' 'Larger Than Life', which I found oddly cheering, for a book about a pregnant woman's relationship breakdown. I'm truly becoming a pregnancy bore, but try as I might, nothing else is as interesting and just about anything can be related to pregnancy and childbirth! I've mostly had a low key, relaxed weekend. Mooching round town buying clothes, breakfast out with the flattie, admiring my baby scan DVD on his HUGE, living room eclipsing, big screen tv and providing intensive care to yet another sick goldfish. I do hope my lack of success with fish isn't indicative of my maternal instincts. The stupid bugger just kept cramming himself up against the filter until he damaged his swim bladder. He was obsessed. Now he's looking very sad in a mixing bowl of salty water, which I have my doubts will work, but I don't want the others to see suicidal fish go belly up.
I think I felt a Braxton Hicks contraction in the bath last night. It felt like an involuntary clenching low down and was very weird. The bubhubbers say they felt them about 16 weeks, so I think it's probably that. My breasts have grown again and I'm finding myself in the plain but oh so comfy maternity bras more and more. I also bought some comfy, but sparkly knickers and should probably put away the glam stuff til there's somebody to appreciate it. I've had three sonographers now comment on my pretty knickers, so I think I'm in the minority and all the other women are in comfy pants! My nipples are pointier still, and definitely look like they could achieve a purpose. To think I spent so many years being concerned that my nipples were flat, inverted and impractical. I had no idea they would change so much. The hundreds I've seen have always been at the other end of pregnancy, so I just assumed those women were born like that. Justine is going to explain breast tissue differentiation to me tomorrow. I'll buy one or two of the sexy maternity bras later on, when it becomes clearer just bow big I'm going to get.
I bought the baby a rabbit. A small, brown, soft rabbit with long ears that Matt thought was a kangaroo. I considered a few baby gowns and bunny rugs but I still think it's too early. The cot shop was closed. I've looked on line and picked out one with a very sweet mossie net over it. It'll be a spring baby so I think the mossie net is a good plan. I doubt he'll have his own room for a long time, but I'm thinking a green theme for his sheets and blankets. I'm really not into gender specifics at such a young age. I'll make him an origami mobile, maybe with a range of animals, maybe just cranes. Then he'll need a capsule for emergency taxi rides, a play mat and a sling. Clothes, cloth nappies, muslins and washable wipes. That's all to begin with, I think. I'm not sure about a baby bath. Maybe somebody will give me one. I've been promised a baby bjorn and some clothes already.
I think he just rolled over.
I'm working my way through recipes from 'Feeding the Bump' and I've just finished realing Adele Parks' 'Larger Than Life', which I found oddly cheering, for a book about a pregnant woman's relationship breakdown. I'm truly becoming a pregnancy bore, but try as I might, nothing else is as interesting and just about anything can be related to pregnancy and childbirth! I've mostly had a low key, relaxed weekend. Mooching round town buying clothes, breakfast out with the flattie, admiring my baby scan DVD on his HUGE, living room eclipsing, big screen tv and providing intensive care to yet another sick goldfish. I do hope my lack of success with fish isn't indicative of my maternal instincts. The stupid bugger just kept cramming himself up against the filter until he damaged his swim bladder. He was obsessed. Now he's looking very sad in a mixing bowl of salty water, which I have my doubts will work, but I don't want the others to see suicidal fish go belly up.
I think I felt a Braxton Hicks contraction in the bath last night. It felt like an involuntary clenching low down and was very weird. The bubhubbers say they felt them about 16 weeks, so I think it's probably that. My breasts have grown again and I'm finding myself in the plain but oh so comfy maternity bras more and more. I also bought some comfy, but sparkly knickers and should probably put away the glam stuff til there's somebody to appreciate it. I've had three sonographers now comment on my pretty knickers, so I think I'm in the minority and all the other women are in comfy pants! My nipples are pointier still, and definitely look like they could achieve a purpose. To think I spent so many years being concerned that my nipples were flat, inverted and impractical. I had no idea they would change so much. The hundreds I've seen have always been at the other end of pregnancy, so I just assumed those women were born like that. Justine is going to explain breast tissue differentiation to me tomorrow. I'll buy one or two of the sexy maternity bras later on, when it becomes clearer just bow big I'm going to get.
I bought the baby a rabbit. A small, brown, soft rabbit with long ears that Matt thought was a kangaroo. I considered a few baby gowns and bunny rugs but I still think it's too early. The cot shop was closed. I've looked on line and picked out one with a very sweet mossie net over it. It'll be a spring baby so I think the mossie net is a good plan. I doubt he'll have his own room for a long time, but I'm thinking a green theme for his sheets and blankets. I'm really not into gender specifics at such a young age. I'll make him an origami mobile, maybe with a range of animals, maybe just cranes. Then he'll need a capsule for emergency taxi rides, a play mat and a sling. Clothes, cloth nappies, muslins and washable wipes. That's all to begin with, I think. I'm not sure about a baby bath. Maybe somebody will give me one. I've been promised a baby bjorn and some clothes already.
I think he just rolled over.
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